Wednesday, March 27, 2013

The not so strong me...

It's been a rough couple of weeks for me around here.  I want to apologize right now for being so wimpy about things but sometimes it's just hard to be strong all the time.
My youngest son, Chris decided to move out with his fiance and rent a house together.  Yes, he needed to move on and start his life again but it all happened so quickly.  I'm not sure they were financially ready but again, I'm reminded that struggle builds character and we all start off with almost nothing.  Don't get me wrong, he needs to and has been ready to move for quite a while.  I am proud of him but it hurts to see him leave. Besides, I'm old fashioned...I not totally comfortable with them living together.  I fear the wedding plans which have barely started will come to a complete halt since they now have the final desired outcome.
I've been struggling with my weight...which is a never ending battle for all women...well 99% anyway.  Since Valentine's Day I've gained 9 pounds.  My hubby is so good to me and never says anything but I do a really good job of beating myself up in that department.  The cortisone shots in my knees have worn off so they are  pretty sore these days and the extra weight doesn't help.  The pain makes it pretty difficult to get out and walk and get some exercise.  Good news is only two more weeks before the next round of shots.  Pretty sad that I look forward to them but I do.  Funny to think that I was the one standing on the hospital bed 8 1/2 months pregnant (with Chris by the way) yelling at the nurse saying no one was touching me with an epidural needle until my hubby came out of the bathroom (he was putting his disposable gown on).  I must have been quite a sight.  I can laugh now and have an awesome young man I call my youngest son.
I think all of this has bothered me so badly since I entered my 5th decade this week.  I was really going to be the one that turning 50 didn't bother.  It's just a number.  I don't know what it is about these milestones in life that bother us so much.  Thirty was easy for me, even 40 wasn't so bad.  This one is really hard for me...but I know in a couple of weeks it won't be such a big deal.  But right now I'm feeling pretty wimpy.
I promise a more uplifting post next time around.  ;0)

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